Listen Up, Y'all by Rabbi Rachel Barenblat

"Listen up, y'all," says Shekhinah
who looks today like a teacher
in corduroy dress and sedate boots.

"Let the smartphone rest a bit,
or learn how to hear My voice
coming through its speaker.

Let your love for Me well up
like unexpected tears. Everyone serves
something: give your life to Me.

Let the channel of your heart open
and My abundance will pour through.
But if you prefer profit, if you pretend --

if you're not real with Me
your life will feel hollow
and your heart be embittered.

I won't punish you; I won't need to.
Your hollowness will be punishment enough,
and the world will suffer for it.

So let My words twine around your arm,
and shine like a headlamp
between your eyes to light your way.

Teach them to everyone you meet.
Write them at the end of your emails
and on your business cards.

Then you'll remember how to live
with the flow of all that is holy --
you'll have heaven right here on earth."

Find more High Holiday liturgy from Bayit at: https://yourbayit.org/holy-at-home/

 

What is Neilah - Closing the Gates

The sun is setting on this holy day, but our tradition still has an 11 o’clock number up its sleeve. Neilah refers to the closing of the gates and symbolizes the waning hours of our atonement. For weeks we’ve been digging into our souls, for days we’ve been apologizing, and for the last 24 hours we’ve been depriving ourselves of comfort while confessing our collective sins. Neilah is the final mile of the marathon. Whatever comes next and the clean slate of a new year is visible on the horizon. We close Yom Kippur with a song and a final ritual.

The  Yamim Noraim  (Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur) are here. We’re tasked with reflecting on our lives and practicing  teshuvah  (returning). Through teshuvah we examine our actions over the past year, seek forgiveness from ourselves, others, and the Divine and dedicate ourselves to do better next year. These sacred days provide an opportunity to ask ourselves the hardest questions and explore all the nooks and crannies of our thoughts, words, and actions over the past year. What’s beautiful about this process is we’re given the awesome opportunity to meet ourselves exactly where we are and practice being accountable. Teshuvah is about living a reflective life and taking responsibility for how we treat ourselves and interact with our family, friends, loved ones, colleagues, and even strangers.

Practice Instructions: Let’s invite our full selves to this practice. Right now in the present, look back over your past year’s journey, while visioning out the potential in the year to come. Before working with the three simple steps below close your eyes for a moment and take a few deep breaths. Bring your awareness to this moment in time, check in with your breath and your body. Feel the seat beneath you. Now return to your breath. Notice how you fill with breath and then how this same breath is released back to the world. As thoughts arise, notice if and where they reside in your body. Notice where you feel tension, and observe your reactions and responses. Use the questions below to guide your teshuvah practice. Spend time with each question and invite yourself to write your most honest answers. This is your practice, your life, and your opportunity to bring your entire self to the process. Whenever your mind inevitably wanders or wavers (which is what minds do), bring yourself back to this work and this paper in your hands. See the holiness in the task at hand, your role in creating the life you want to live and the capacity that you hold at every moment. With every breath, you can use the practice of teshuvah to return, reflect, forgive, and move forward.

1. Reflect
Over the past year, did I fully live my values? Did I treat other people how I would want to be treated? What do I most regret? What am I most proud of?

2. Seek Forgiveness
From whom must I ask forgiveness? To whom must I offer my forgiveness (regardless of outcome)?

3. Letting Go & Moving Forward
How can I release myself from any residue of the past year? What do I want to practice, seek, or commit myself to this year?

May we all be blessed with a sweet & meaningful New Year.

On Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, we read the traditional confessional prayer, the Vidui, which has two parts: Ashamnu and Al Chet. Both are written in the first person plural. No matter who surrounds us, we share the responsibility for what we have done wrong and the obligation to do better in the future. Recently, positive versions of the Ashamnu have emerged, helping us appreciate where we have done well in the past year. 

These modern interpretations can help you to reflect on where you’ve made mistakes and where you’ve created good in the world. Some people have a custom of beating their fist against their heart as they confess each sin, and of massaging their hearts with an open hand for every appreciation. 

Confess/Thorns                                               Appreciate/Roses           

We have behaved arrogantly                             We have adored

We have betrayed ourselves and others           We have blessed ourselves and others  

We have acted out of contempt                         We have comforted 

We have been dishonest                                   We have directed our energies toward truth

We have erred out of ignorance                        We have been empathetic 

We have forgotten who we are                          We have forgiven past wrongs 

We have gossiped                                             We have grown 

We have been hypocritical                                We have helped even when we weren’t asked 

We have been insensitive                                 We have insisted on loving each other 

We have justified bad decisions                        We have been just 

We have killed our impulse to do good             We have been kind 

We have looked the other way                         We have learned 

We have been mean                                        We have been merciful    

We have been neglectful                                  We have nursed compassion from scorn

We have acted out of fear instead of love        We have been open-minded 

We have pushed too much                               We have spoken positively 

We have been quiet when we should have spoken up                   We have questioned in a healthy way 

We have refused to help when we had the ability                           We have respected our friends and family

We have slandered                                           We have supported strangers 

We have taken from others when we had enough for ourselves     We have cultivated truth

We have been untrue                                        We have unlearned falsehoods 

We have behaved violently                               We have validated each others’ feelings

We have withheld what could have been given freely                     We have been willing to change 

We have been xenophobic                               We have experienced pure joy 

We have yielded to our worst impulses            We have yearned for a better future

We have zealously protected evil-doers           We have zestily given our best  

Positive Vidui adapted from Rabbi Avi Weiss: https://opensiddur.org/prayers/lunisolar/high-holy-days/life-affirming-vidui-by-rabbi-avi-weiss/

And G!d says: "And you shall make sure that every time you list the litany of your ugly, and your rotten and your wicked, you end the litany with a prescription for how to move on from it - through reflection, reparation and repair - so that you do not get stuck in the ugly, which is mighty and sticky and will close your ears to the shofar and keep you asleep and in despair.”
 

And G!D says: "Rosh Hashanah has another name: Yom HaZikaron, the Day of Remembrance. And Yom Kippur is called the Day of Judgement. But on Yom Kippur, we cast aside all things that allow us to forget the horrors of the world. All our escape routes. All our distractions. We wake today to face the horrors head-on, so if you want to call Yom Kippur the Day of Staying Woke, that works, too."

And G!d says: “And on this day, you will not be able to turn to another for comfort or escape, but instead must hold yourself. You will surprise yourself with how much enough you are.”

And G!d says: "And lo, let us go. Go deep. Go in. You have done what you can. And now is the time to face yourself. Go with courage, for you are doing the work of the righteous. Go with comfort, for you have not given up. Go with trembling, for though you are small, you are an indispensable part of the greatness.  You are necessary. You are essential. You are here." 

And G!d says: "And on Yom Kippur, you shall pull away from the pleasures of music, food, drink, but most of all - touch. On this day, you may not lose yourself in another, must withdraw from the dizzying drama of the community, to be alone with yourself - and this is holy work. It is not selfishness. Ultimately, it will lead you out of loneliness."

And G!d says: "Why you remind yourself that your origin is dust, and your end is dust, and humans are but a flock of vanishing dreams: you can't do this work from high up. The work is to be done from your most vulnerable place ~ and what faster way to get vulnerable than go deep into mortality? Shine your lantern on the rotten, the ugly, the stinking guts of yourself, reeking with shame and bile. Bring it to the light. Then get to work."

And G!d says: "And when you have wrung yourself out, and it is the middle of the afternoon, and you are together wailing, take a break. Go outside and smell the garden herbs, go to the couch and rest. Do not do Torah Yoga, for that is an abomination and appropriative as all get-out. But stretch your beaten, hungry body, and give it what care you are permitted on Yom Kippur. To find self-kindness in the midst of atonement - that is the holiest part of the day."

And G!d says: "And when you face the ugly, you will do so with your fist upon your chest, beating at the place where your heart hides, in the hope that you will crack yourself open and let the light in."

And G!d says: "That when you cannot face the ugly because it is too hard and you hurt too much, that's why we have a book full of prayers, idiot. To give yourself a scaffolding through the process of acknowledgment and repentance. So open it and find something that resonates, because otherwise you might get stuck feeling guilty instead of moving towards healing. Keep moving, even when you're not doing it perfectly. Perfection is the enemy of t'shuvah"
 

From Dane Kuttler's The G!d Wrestlers,  The Social Justice Warrior's Guide to the High Holy Days, Sept. 2015

Hineni. Here I Am.

This is the time of year when we would ordinarily be together. When we would reflect on what has been and celebrate the sweetness of what is to come.

But this year, the Hebrew word “Hineni” takes on a new meaning.

It’s not just a call for our prayers to be heard. This year we say “Here I am” as a commitment.

We commit to being present for ourselves, for our loved ones, and for our greater community—even if we can't be present in person. There has never been a more important time to do so.

For more ways to reflect, reconnect, and renew over this year’s High Holidays, visit: https://reflect.reformjudaism.org/
Each activity can be completed alone or with family and friends.

Shanah Tovah!